Wednesday, March 25, 2015

Things I Learned on My Trip - Part 5

5. It takes a village. Our village in Vegas is bigger than I knew until I was gone.

When you are a military family and don't live near any family, it is really easy to feel isolated and alone. Sometimes on days when I have no plans with the kids and Troy is at work, I get in this weird funk.

I get in this circular thinking where I'm like, "I miss my family. And my friends. I don't know anyone. I need to make more friends. Troy needs to get out of the military so we can be closer to our support system. I don't think I can do this today. I just can't. I miss my mom. Maybe I'll FaceTime her. Why isn't she picking up? Is she mad at me? I'll try my sister. What could she POSSIBLY be doing that is more important than talking to me? My family hates me. Why isn't Troy home today? I wish he could just take leave. Everyday. Except for when I have to work. He should only work when I work. I need to get a grip. I need more friends." And it goes on and on.

But here's the funny thing. I went on this trip and there were several people who stopped by, brought Troy dinner, invited them over, and checked on them while I was gone. Some of it was planned and some was unexpected. And they all called or texted with updates on how Troy and the girls seemed to getting along without Mommy there. While I was gone and getting phone calls and message with updates, I kept thinking, "Wow, our support network in Vegas is really great. I'm a whiner. They're really stepping up to help us out. This is great!"

I'm not saying that Troy couldn't have done it by himself. I have NO doubt that everyone would have been alive when I got home. But I AM saying that they might have lived on chicken nuggets, french fries and green beans the entire time I was gone. With an occasional mac n cheese or peanut butter and jelly. On that diet, their gallbladders would have been going crazy, but no one would have been dead.

Troy only worked 2 days the whole time I was gone. He said it was funny because when he initially submitted leave for that week and his reason was to stay in town at home with the kids, some of the dads he works with were like, "oh no, 10 days all by yourself with the kids? Eek, good luck." So on the 2 days he went in to work, people were saying things like, "Are your kids still alive?" or "Are you guys ok?" He was actually a little offended, which I thought was cute. At one point he called and said to me, "You know, you were with the kids for 2 months while I was at SOS. And you've had them for a couple weeks while I did other TDYs. I can handle a few days. They're my kids too."

Respect. That's a good daddy right there. Love him.

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