Saturday, September 28, 2013

I Got Stuck on the Floor in the Shower

I'm not allowed to take showers unsupervised. Just in case I need help. I have thought this was a stupid rule previously.

Troy promised me that if I could keep it together and keep the babies in until 30 weeks, I could go to the prenatal spa that is attached to my doctor's office for a massage. Last week, I finally went! YAY! It was awesome. But like any paranoid woman who gets a pedicure or massage, you don't want to be the wildabeast/sasquatch who shows up with hairy legs.

Now, any kind of lower body hygiene is becoming a challenge due to the size of this massive belly. I have never been someone who can prop their leg up on the side of tub and shave. I have ALWAYS sat down in the tub. Always. Even in my college dorm. Gross, right?

I hadn't shaved my legs in about 2-3 weeks and it was craaaaaazy gross. So I sit down in my shower. It looks like this:

I got shaved up, all proud of myself, even though it took 20 minutes and some yoga/pretzel positioning. I use conditioner to shave. It works just as well as shaving cream and is cheaper. And keeps the clutter down in my shower. Win-win, right? Except in this situation. When I attempted to stand up, the floor was SOOOO slippery and there was NO way I could stand without assistance. I got stuck here:

I was feeling pretty embarrassed. Like, beached whale embarrassed. So I sat in the bottom of the tub and washed my face and conditioned my hair. And then I sat there for another couple of minutes trying to figure out if there was a way for me to get up without calling out Troy, who was reading in our bed. After conditioning my hair, the tub was even more slippery and now my body felt a little slippery too. There was NO way.

So, I tentatively called out to Troy. He stuck his head in and saw me looking pathetic on the floor. I didn't even tell him what happened...he already knew. He just opened the shower door and said, "Honey, do you need help getting up?" "Yeah."

So he helped me up and stood there watching me dry off and get dressed...judging me.

The next day, he and Avery went to Walmart because he needed a Duck Dynasty beard for church. Seriously. I'll put up pictures tomorrow of THAT. For sure. He came home with his beard and a shower chair.

I still shower with supervision and now I am sitting for all my showers. Not just to shave. You'd think I'd be cool with using an adaptive device, seeing as how I'm an Occupational Therapist and that's kind of my job. Buuuuuuuuuuut, I just feel like an invalid. APPARENTLY, it's safer. And not going to lie, my shower last night with the chair with pretty relaxing. And my feet didn't turn into sausages. And my feet and legs don't feel like they're going to explode after standing for 10 minutes. Because a shower is the longest period of time I stand for all day. Yep.

I'll be 32 weeks on monday! YAY!

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